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Jennifer would have saved the party



(Graphic courtesy of Pro Trump News.)

Tulsi Gabbard will not be on stage for the next Democrat debate as the party changed its rules once again. The new rule apparently is you must be at least 75 to be president. Which is just as well because at 38, she is too young to be the one to save the party.

Jennifer is. Or was.

Only 7 years older, Jennifer was born in that sweetspot for girls, back when girls had to work twice as hard to get as much as a boy. It was not like today when any Tom, Dick, or Harry can put on a dress and become a girl.

She grew up reading Judy Blume and trying to be Martina Navratilova on the tennis court. She even taught herself to play left handed. It bothered Jennifer for a while when her heroine came out of the closet. And then it bothered her that it bothered her. And then she got over herself.

You did not have to like her politics to like her. She was that type of girl. She had the charm of Reagan and the charisma of Kennedy.

And yes, I will call her a girl. I was 20 years older than her to the exact date.

Jennifer worked hard on her makeup and had big hair in the '80s. She grew up watching MTV, kissed her first boy at 14, and had her first beer at 18. She worked at a video store to pay for community college before landing a scholarship at Kenyon College, the alma mater of Rutherford B. Hayes, our first Kenyon president.

She went to Stanford for law school, the alma mater of Sandra Day O'Connor, the first woman on the Supreme Court, another of her heroines because of all the sexism O'Connor overcame.

Jennifer wanted to be the first woman president. After law school, she landed an assistant U.S. attorney job, then ran for state attorney general. She lost but came back 4 years later and won. Never count the woman out. Governor was next. She campaigned hard for Hillary.

Now at 46, it was Jennifer's turn. Beautiful, athletic, and smart, she would have the tenacity to give President Donald John Trump a run for his money by actually seeking to flip his voters. And after her loss, she would make no excuses, instead working that much harder to win in 2024.

Except she died on January 23, 1973, the day after the Roe v.  Wade decision and exactly a month after her mother learned she was pregnant. With abortion now the law of the land -- a right! -- she aborted Jennifer. Her mother was not too young, not poor, and not single. She just did not want another child.

(And no, I was not her father nor is she a relative nor is she the child of anyone I know.)

James Taranto of the Wall Street Journal coined the phrase "Roe Effect," a theory that holds that because liberals tend to abort children and conservatives tend to raise them that over time there are fewer liberal voters. This would explain why liberals want to import voters from Mexico, Kenya, and Somalia.

But the Roe Effect also applies to candidates, and in 2020 it left the cupboard bare for Democrats. They are down to a 30-something Samoan, and 2 Geriatric Cranks who are too old to be Baby Boomers.

As Bette Davis sang, "They're Either Too Young or Too Old."

Yes, President Donald John Trump is 73. But he bested a field in 2016 that had Ted Cruz (then 45) and Marco Rubio (then 44). They will be in their 50s in 2024.

Bernie Sanders and Joe Biden bested Mike Bloomberg (78) and Elizabeth Warren (70).

On July 21, all three of the top Democrats in the House will be 80 or older. Steve Scalise (54) and Kevin McCarthy (55) are their opposite numbers in the House.

The inability of the Democrat Party to produce quality candidates is a blinking idiot light on the political dashboard. Jennifer would have saved the party.

The Roe decision aborted her. Every Supreme Court justice who voted for it was confirmed by a Democrat Senate.

47 years later, the bill comes due.

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